Elves Gone Wild! "Nuttin' But Spam" Parody of "Nuttin' for Christmas"

NUTTIN' BUT SPAM
Parody of "Nuttin' for Christmas" (Tepper/Bennett)
Lyrics by M. Spaff Sumsion

PERFORMED BY ROBERT LUND
Sage Lund and Macy Lund: Children's Vocals
Robert Lund: Everything Else
From the CD Elves Gone Wild! BUY @ $10.99

Play/Download from The FuMP
Sample/Download from the Mad Music Archive
View the KUTV News Feature about this song (WMV format - 7.5 MB)
Request it on the Dr. Demento Show!

"Hysterical and well-written. In my opinion, much better than the original I sang fifty years ago. Thanks for the giggles!" - Barry Gordon

I checked my box at AOL
Somebody e-mailed me
A chirpy voice said "You've got mail"
Somebody e-mailed me
But it's all crap from herbal quacks
Tricks for dodging income tax
Russian nymphomaniacs
Somebody e-mailed me

I got a computer for Christmas
Eight zillion M.B. of RAM
But I'm gettin' hostile for Christmas
'Cause I'm gettin' nuttin' but spam

I don't need loans from offshore banks
Somebody e-mailed me
I've never owned no septic tanks
Somebody e-mailed me
Old Iraq Most Wanted cards
Kinky housewives' warm regards
No-repayment Mastercards
Somebody e-mailed me

Oh, I'm gettin' freaked out for Christmas
How do they know where I am?
I'm gettin' ornery for Christmas
'Cause I'm gettin' nuttin' but spam

They've got Viagra at half price
Somebody e-mailed me
A voodoo weight control device
Somebody e-mailed me
I don't need hidden camera stuff
Donald Rumsfeld in the buff
My kielbasa's long enough!
Somebody e-mailed me

Oh, I'm gettin' ticked off for Christmas
Free pay-per-view is a scam
And I'm gettin' angry for Christmas
'Cause I'm gettin' nuttin' but spam

So you better back off
Whatever you do
If I track you down I'm warning you
I'll get postal for Christmas!

Back to Elves Gone Wild!

Also known as "I'm Getting Nuttin' But Spam," "I'm Getting Nothing But Spam," "I'm Getting Nuthin' But Spam," and/or "I'm Getting Nothin' But Spam," a parody of "I'm Getting Nuttin' for Christmas," "I'm Getting Nothing for Christmas," "I'm Getting Nuthin' for Christmas," and/or "I'm Getting Nothin' for Christmas." Whew.